ALWAYS FEELING SECOND BEST? HOW TO COPE WITH THE INNER DEMONS OF NEVER BEING GOOD ENOUGH

You’re special and you know that! You are constantly reminded how special and valued you are by your circle and your immediate environment so why do you feel so alone? I feel like some of us are blessed with this invisible force field that keeps us away from harm. But you feel like that force field is keeping you from experiencing important, developmental experiences that your peers are already so accustomed to. This can totally be internalized into a feeling of being left out and overlooked. We are all looking for a sense of community. A place where we can express our true emotions. But at times it’s hard to explain your feeling of absolute melancholy to others. Deep down you know that if you share what’s on your mind it might just do more damage than good, so you heal yourself from within. Dust yourself off and keep on existing on this planet. Coping with feeling like you are always a second choice isn’t an easy one. Especially when you personally do feel deserving of love, success, and happiness.

You’ve been doing all of the work on yourself and putting constant effort into the clichés of self-improvement and self-love. Yet your reality reflects the exact opposite. The most bummer part about this whole situation is that you get a front-row seat to the reality of your peers the people you care about more than anything constantly moving forward in their lives. Getting to experience situations that you can only dream of. Constantly reminded of your insecurities, mistakes, and shortcomings and the only person who truly understands what you’re going through is yourself. You may even find it hard to verbally express how you really feel because of the fear of vulnerability. Metaphorically backed into a corner with your hands tied and your mouth taped shut. Unable to escape this constant pain of sadness and never-ending catastrophes. An endless purgatory of never feeling good enough curses you. Why? I honestly don’t know. Life is really uncertain, very complicated, and unfair we know this.

But does life really need to be a battle between your happiness and sanity? Constantly fighting for a slice of contentment in this life is a war that one can easily lose if not properly prepared. It’s so easy to go down a rabbit hole of feeling behind in life. Tap through a few insta stories and view all the glossy successes of everyone you admire. You smile In support but cry on the inside because you’re totally afraid that you won’t get your happily ever after. And that all this pain will be worth nothing when you finally reach the end of your life. Depressing, but this is real! This feeling is inescapable at times so how do we cope? the simple answer keep trying, that’s all you can do. Be grateful for the blessings you can see and the successes you do have. Try and stay positive about that happy ending you so desperately desire. You can’t control other’s actions towards you and honestly, it’s really hard to control how you react in the situations at hand.

Especially when these situations are more than ego-crushing and internally devastating. But all I can say is don’t give up because that’s when you really lose the battle. As the underdog, it’s up to you to fight through this. Accept what is happening and understand it’s out of your control. Remember that your superpower is your inner peace and joy that only you have true control over. Allow yourself to feel whatever you feel and start festering that power of joy from within to help heal the wounds only you can feel. Whenever I’m feeling like this I simply remind myself of how special I really am. Because deep down even though you may be overlooked underestimated and picked last. You know what you’re capable of and no matter how many times you get knocked down eventually you know you will succeed because you’re totally deserving of that bliss. If I can offer one last piece of advice it is to always authentically be yourself.

If you always feel like a second choice the least you can do is let your inner sparkle shine whenever you can. live a life where you are expressing your inner soul in a manner of unapologetic confidence. So when these situations present themselves you can at least say “I’m just being myself and this must have not been meant for me”. With all that said this feeling is really hard like 10th-grade geometry, hard lol. But you got this! If there’s one thing this guy believes in it's miracles. I have witnessed magic truly happen on this earth. When you feel like you are at your end your next blessing is truly just around the corner. You just have to “wait for it” as my dazzling mother always tells me. Don’t let these insecurities win. Be authentically you and never give up hope, that’s the key. I really hoped this helped someone. I want you to know you’re not alone and it’s going to get better in due time.

Stay strong friends love dressy <3